Dear ancient church,
You raised me. You built a firm foundation within me through your Christ-centered beauty, tradition and faith. Because of you, I have given my life to Christ and have experienced the splendor of being a Daughter of the King! You have helped me discern my vocation of marriage. You have called me to sainthood. You have been the tabernacle of my faith.
You, Catholicism, have set the standard of what is moral and holy, especially when it comes to the “family”! Mary’s “yes”, Joseph’s selfishness and Jesus’ life, death and resurrection all are significant truths of how we should choose to live our life here on earth as we await Heaven. You have illustrated Jesus’ life so beautifully, which in turn has inspired me to be “Christ” to others and has instilled a strong desire to build a family on the very foundation you laid before me.
Five and a half years ago, I became one flesh with my husband. We exchanged vows and promised to be open to new life and new wine. Though our hearts were ready for what our union was anticipated to create, we soon realized that my physical body would fail our hopes month after month.
How can this deep desire and calling that came purely through faith now come up void in the very act of our faith?
I needed to cope. I have searched for consolation within the borders of my diocese and beyond. To no avail, I have yet to find it. Where is your support in this barren dessert I walk? The Word focuses on the most beautiful women in the Bible who were barren, and through God’s healing power, bore life! But as I have sought for your aid and prayer, where has your disciples’ Faith activation been to believe with me and pray over me to receive the same type of healing as the women of Faith in the Bible did?
I have felt totally abandoned and broken. I still question “Is there a place for me here?” As someone who is presently barren.
Ancient Church, I need you to acknowledge that there are present people within your walls that long to build their family but feel misfitting in such a family structured environment. This is a hard truth. It’s this very environment that has built our desires and our deep longing to have a family of our own. As the body of Christ, I know we are imperfect people who serve a perfect God. I’m not discrediting you. However, I am asking you to embrace the infertile community and make a place for us here. We need acknowledgment. We need support. We need to feel that we are enough. But most importantly, we need leaders that will believe with us, pray over us and stand in the promises for the miraculous!! Otherwise, we will walk, and we will seek and find refuge elsewhere.
If we are such a pro-life church, we need you to sit with those who are awaiting new life to grow in such a desolate season.
My suggestions?? Let’s start with Theology of the Body and infertility! Also, offer support groups and healing services for those walking through infertility, loss and adoption. Most importantly, our church leaders and parishioners need to understand the significance and power we have through the gifts of the Holy Spirit to activate our faith, call forth miracles and be the hands and feet of Jesus in a Supernatural way!
Overall, what encouraged me to write this open letter to you is a friend who is fighting for the same thing. Her voice is powerful in the Natural Procreation movement. She has given so many couples a voice to share and demand their needs from you, Church.
So here I am sharing mine. Lending my voice and theirs to you.
On behalf of us all, I hope you embrace it.
With expectant faith,